Goodbye my friend

"Toby"
May 3, 1996 - October 26, 2009

"I lost a special friend today
the kind you can't replace,
and looking at his empty bed
I still can see his face.

I know he's in a special place
our Lord has for such friends,
Where meadows, lakes & flowers
help make them strong and whole again.

I know he's watching over me
He'll be with me when I cry,
So with one more kiss on his beloved head
I told my friend goodbye."

Today I said good-bye to the best dog I've ever had...and ever will. Tobias Oliver Jared was released from his life here on earth, to rest in peace and in our memories.

My Dearest Toby,
I love you with all of my heart...you were my first "baby". I'll never forget holding your 2-week body in my hand and telling the breeder, "this is the one"! From day one you had an independent streak that told me we were a perfect pair. And we were. I hold tight to the days when we ran together, hiked the California trails, swam at Chatfield dog park, and played in the neighborhood park...chasing your beloved tennis balls with everything you had. And boy you loved to swim! You could sniff out water a mile away and I was often found running after you, frantically calling your name while you ignored me and bolted for the beach. You saw me through a lot of changes in 13 years. You accepted Tom when I got married and you (begrudgingly) put up with two kids climbing all over you. You were a trooper! But now, now you are no longer imprisoned by a body that is in pain. You are free...free to run, free to swim, free to lay in the sun. That said, I miss you more than you can possibly know.

Thanks for memories, friend. I'll forever cherish them.

9/11

It's been 8 years since that tragic day. I still remember it like it was yesterday. I hear about people recalling where they were when they heard the news...I was in my car going to my 6am boot camp workout in San Jose, CA. At that time they didn't know it was a commercial airplane and that it was a terrorist attack. An hour later I was back in the car hearing with horror that another plane had crashed into the towers. I stayed home from work, glued to the television coverage and realizing that someone had declared war on us. It was so surreal. I was angry, I was heartbroken, I was fiercely patriotic. I think for once all Americans felt the same way and for a brief moment in time we were truly the United States of America. I will never forget. And I will always be proud of the men and women who answered the call to defend our country, regardless of political agendas. My husband was one of them and I love him for that.

On to current dilemmas. C has been back in school for 2 weeks now. I was so looking forward to whittling down to one child for half the day...I could run errands and get things done that are normally much more complicated with 2 children in tow. Well, that part is good. The part that is not so good is the fact that we have either A) a class clown or B) a child with ADHD on our hands. Not sure which and we are working to get him evaluated by professionals. Honestly, every day that I go to pick up C, I pray that he behaved and that I get the "good boy" report. It happens about half of the time. There is no rhyme or reason to his bad vs. good days. One day he is Beaver Cleaver, the next day he is Eddie Haskell. I never know which personality will emerge and it is aggravating! We bribe, we threaten, we cry...I just don't know what registers with the kid. The thing is, he never had any accountability for the the first 4 years of his life. Being an orphan, his basic needs were met but that was it. There were no expectations, no responsibilities. I doubt he even heard the word "no" very much. Urg.
On the other hand, E has heard the word "no" and is saying it quite often. Double urg. Perhaps I should go back to work...ha.

Let Them Eat cake...er, frosting!

Today was a day of creativity for me. I spent some of it re-designing my blog for no other reason than it's just fun to experiment with HTML's and templates. I'm happy with the result (facebook friends can see it by clicking on "view original post" at the end of this entry), so perhaps it will stay put for awhile.

Then it was time to make a cake for me the kids. I've been on this cake-making kick since getting hooked on the TV show "Ace of Cakes". I'm going to take classes in September for cake-decorating...mainly because I am so bored with staying home and not honing my creativity in kitchen design anymore. Actually, I'm still not sure which hobby I want to pick up: photography or cake decoration. Photography is kind of out for now because the camera I want is a Nikon DSLR and it sells for upwards of $1k. Cake decoration is cheaper, but then I know I will eventually find my kitchen too small and my oven too inefficient...which will make the camera seem cheap in comparison. I feel for Tom as he will bear the brunt of this vexing issue.

Anyway, I made a traditional white/yellowish cake with chocolate butter frosting. Not too complex, but I focused on technique more than anything. Dare I say it turned out quite nicely..?
The kids enjoyed it too...

Facebook and Other Things

I've been staying home with the kiddos for the last 6+ months and it is full of ups and downs. It is HARD to transition from a full-time job to stay-at-home mom. I know, women say that all the time, but it is so true! Not to mention it seriously is the most challenging rewarding job I've ever had. I just wish I got paid for it. Perhaps with all these govt. bailouts, I can petition for "mom's wages"...you mock but these days it doesn't seem so ridiculous.

So, a few months ago I finally got on the bandwagon and created a Facebook page. It's been awesome reconnecting with old friends who I have lost contact with, especially the best friends who made my childhood so memorable. For that I like FB. BUT, it is a love/hate relationship. Isn't it a bit narcissistic to assume that everyone in your world wants to know what you ate for breakfast? I know, it's not like that. Whatever. Enough about that.

I'm old. My 20-year high school reunion is coming up here in about a month and it's depressing to think about. I honestly don't feel ready to attend a 20-year reunion of anything! I have a one-year-old for crying out loud! Alas, I can't ignore the facts. I am almost forty. I remember my parents turning forty, they had over-the-hill parties and wore black. Definitely not ready for that. Isn't 40 the new 30? I'm telling myself that at any rate...
Anyway, I'm not going to my reunion. I'm realizing that these reunions are more for the ones who enjoyed high school and have maintained the relationships that they had back in the day. I had to move from Colorado to California at the angst-ridden, pubescent age of 13 and never had the confidence to enjoy those following years. I missed my old friends and my old home for much of it and, the minute I graduated, was back in Colorado for college. So, reliving those years is just not where I want to go right now. Now if there were a college reunion...whole different story!

On to my wonderful children...
C is 5(!) and a true boy. He's supposed to start kindergarten this year, but after an evaluation, we have decided to hold him back a year. His maturity level isn't quite there yet so hopefully another year of preschool will help. He's a bright kid, so I have no doubt that at some point he will catch up to his peers. We are excited to take him on his first camping trip to the Grand Tetons and Yellowstone later this month.

E turned 1 on June 26 and is such a joy. She is growing like a weed and is almost walking! She has taken 4 steps in a row at various times, but relies on her fast crawling to get around.

Today I took her picture in her very first pigtails!

I am a little nervous for the camping trip where, for the first time, she will be away from her crib for more than a couple of days. Routine is huge at this age, so she may have some adjustment issues.

That's where we are right now. I did a little better this time and only let a few months slip by without updates. Small steps, right?

Has it *really* been 1-1/2 years?!

Wow, time sure flies. I have to apologize for the serious delinquency in updating this blog! So much has happened over the past year that it has been nearly impossible to update on our life as Bean settles in with new parents and a new sister. Since I am no longer the care-free, all the time in the world-type person anymore, I'll bullet-point all the highlights...

-C had successful heart surgery on March 7, 2008. The 2cm hole between his left and right atrium's (termed an "atrial septal defect" or ASD) was patched via an arterial catheter at Children's Hospital. The doctors were AMAZING and we were really well taken care of. Subsequent check-ups, however, have not revealed a huge improvement in the efficiency of his heart, so we anticipate valve replacement 10 or so years from now.

-We welcomed E.G. into our family on June 26, 2008. C's new little sister weighed 7lbs 6oz, and was 21.75" long. She takes after daddy in height so I see those awkward years of high-water pants in her future, poor girl.

-We all flew to Wisconsin Dells for Thanksgiving '08 where Tami's Grandparents met their first great-grandkids for the first time. It was truly a blessing to see 4 generations together for the holiday!

-Tami quit her job in January due to high childcare and preschool costs and has been a "homemaker" since then. It has taken some adjustment and lots of patience, but it has been the right decision with regard to lessening overall stress. Eventually there is a plan for her to return to work, but that will wait until C starts kindergarten this Fall and when E is somewhat independent with her mobility and eating skills (less money for daycare).

-C just lost his first tooth! His lower front tooth had been quite loose for some time, so one night we just pulled on it gently and out it came. C is pretty excited about growing some "big boy" teeth and is already feeling around for other loose teeth. The money from the tooth fairy doesn't hurt either! ;)

So that is our past year in a nutshell. We feel so blessed with our wonderful new family, and it has been quite a learning curve! C is an amazing big brother and really is wonderful with E. Perhaps his time in the foster home helped him hone those skills, but whatever the case we could not be more proud of him. Additionally his English is rather impressive! It is so incredible how easily it came to him and how well he has adapted. The only sad thing is the loss of his Hungarian language, but with so few people speaking it, we hope it isn't a big regret. We are already looking forward to a trip to Hungary in a few years, when E can last that long on a plane and C can really appreciate where he came from.

Hope all is well with those who still read this, I'll try to be more on top of updates in the future!